 “WHEN THE BOTTOMS COME UP”© Copyright 5-22-2007 By Dana Shino, The Purple Phoenix, LLC www.thepurplephoenix.com Patricia Volk’s Oprah Magazine article interviewing Barbara Cook appeared quietly and benignly in my office, in my life, a little before all hell broke loose. Cook said this about “Finding Your Voice”: "Take off your emotional clothes and be naked. It's scary. But this is where safety lies. The core place. If we can sing, dance, paint (write, live) from that place, we cannot be wrong." So, on opening night of “Spider Man III,” I picked a fight with a woman in the movie theatre towards the end of the show. I was tired of her two children crawling over me for the eighth or ninth time to visit the bathroom (and play in the aisle). Politely, I had switched myself over to automatic pilot and ignored them. By the time I noticed my mental red flags waving and the bells whistling in my head, I had internally overstepped my kind, patient threshold and was precariously balancing in the 'blow up' zone. Somewhere in the middle of the confrontation with her, I realized it felt really good to unleash. I'd always let other people's well-being come before my own. Not this time. I found my voice in the middle of my truth and was letting her and everyone know. God love Bob. He stepped between the two of us, preventing an all out cat fight. By the time I arrived in the parking lot I had been called ‘bitch’ as well as ‘white trash’ and spit upon. I was quite proud of all this. Once my adrenaline lulled and Bob and I were sipping a cup of tea at my home, I wondered, "What got into me?!" I've never picked a fight with anyone. One night later, I was standing in the middle of Bob's living room in the middle of my own emotional nakedness (and emotional messiness) voicing with great emotional honesty (and intensity) what I did and did not want in our relationship. I'd woken up from the safe rotation of our routine, and internally I felt it was paramount to stand in the middle of my truth for myself and be my voice. God love Bob, again. He valiantly suffered the experience of two break ups in three days, though we are still holding a conversation with one another. In the midst of this, I felt pulled to visit a local Healing Circle hosted by Fred and Karen. It had been months since I’d attended their circle, but the May meeting felt important. I went to the meeting and when it was my turn for the table, I experienced waves of energy releasing off of me. Crying never felt so carthartic, so good. Something was giving way in me. During the circle, Fred, who owns and runs a construction company, received a cell phone call. The call was to let him know one of his workers, a young man, had taken his life. He was the last person on the crew anyone expected to make and act on such a decision. Someone at the Healing Circle touched in to the young man's spirit and said, "It feels like he is needed more on the other side than here." And after a few moments, Fred commented, "You know, I think we have so much invested right here, right now in this lifetime." The call reminded me that in my practice, I had been receiving a high percentage of people asking, "What is the use of staying?" "None of this makes sense anymore." "I am thinking of going." When I began my business, these were not thoughts I ever anticipated fielding. That evening I remembered something Bob had described to me last Fall about a lake's seasonal biological change. At seasonal overlaps, from Summer into Fall and Winter into Spring, a lake’s water bottoms churn up from underneath and rise while the top falls – all that is underneath bubbles to the surface. Witnessing my life, my practice and many of the lives around me somehow feels similar to this seasonal lake phenomenon. For many of us, the higher resonances of energy levels on the planet are causing our very soul bottoms to be shook loose and rise - even if we don't want them too. All the things that are buried at the very core of our lives are coming to light. This all looks very confusing on the outside. What used to be real doesn't look that way anymore. What used to be important is changing. The very things we've buried for lifetimes are rising like air bubbles and popping right next to us on the surface. I think it’s fair that it would cause so many of us to question what we are doing here and why we should stay. The intent in my own questions intuitively led me back to Karen and Fred’s doorstep several days later for an energy session with Karen Lovelien (www.soulularclarity.com). I scheduled the meeting feeling I needed something, but not knowing exactly what. Although I felt afraid, my body could not get me there fast enough – I felt like I was coughing up energy that needed releasing. As I drove up the driveway, I felt my stomach flip and I sensed I would be leaving as an entirely different person. Karen and I worked with one another for about seven hours. More of my lake bottoms rose than I thought I could handle. During the session I was cognizant of being inside myself and simultaneously having a bird's eye view of my life. Karen’s deep and adept intuitive experience, skill and knowledge guided me through a session requiring every ounce of my own personal emotional, mental and intuitive presence. I used so many informational life lesson pieces I possessed. But what sustained me most through the session was my willingness to vulnerably voice my emotional honesty in the center of my emotional truth. When we were finished, I held more of my energetic self in wholeness in my body than I have since I was two years old. The experience, quite frankly, was similar to laying Spiritual Tread on a strip of Lifetime Asphalt, standing Seven Lifetimes on their Ear in seven hours. ...Yes, it is a challenging time to be alive on this planet. Yes, things are changing. Yes, it’s perfectly natural to deeply question the changes and your place here. Yes, some of it is very ugly, yet some of it is very beautiful, but mostly it continues to grow more real. And since my altercation with the woman in the movie theatre, I am beginning to believe that amidst the chaos, energetic ground shifting, and ‘soul bottoms rising,’ the safest place to be is actually in the scariest (and sometimes messiest) place: standing in the center of your naked, vulnerable emotional truth – just like Barbara Cook said. This is where you stay connected, most of all, to yourself.  Your contributions help support The Purple Phoenix Press.
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