© Copyright 1-23-2008 By Dana Shino, The Purple Phoenix, LLC www.thepurplephoenix.com I’ve always been afflicted by my psychic gene. I just didn’t entirely understand this until recently. What was the source of my affliction? My family. For a long time now, like any family, my family has told accepted emotional and psychological lies to one another—some unconscious and some subconscious and some not. These lies run around our family like Laurel and Hardy running around bases trying to figure out “Who is on first?” For each of us, this is how we emotionally survived (and still survive) within playing out our accustomed roles. No one counted on one simple thing: Dana’s internal truth wiring was hooked up more strongly than anyone anticipated for this lifetime. So, every time a lie rounded third base and slid into home plate (or rounded first and slid into home plate backwards), the cleats of the lie slid right into my truth wiring. Abrasions appeared along my truth wiring line where the cleats of habitual familial lies repeatedly bumped and rubbed. (What’s truth wiring? It’s an internal experience and place each of us universally and uniquely possesses. It’s our authentic internal truth, hooked inexplicably to our sacred soul, our highest self, our connection with God. Our internal truth also might look and function a lot like an internal ‘tuning fork of truth’— when something of the ilk of our personal truth strikes near us on the outside, our internal tuning fork resonates within us. Truth wiring is unique, yet universal. We all resonate with our unique truth, yet we all resonate to universal truth.) As the years passed and the abrasions grew, I unhooked, numbed, and ignored my ‘truth wiring’ as a way for my psyche to find an emotionally, psychologically functional and safe path within my core family unit. Even before the memory of my life engaged, I unconsciously and subconsciously compensated, finding and choosing this alternate route for my psyche. For a long time I blindly lived balancing at the fulcrum point of emotional self preservation within the family at the hidden cost of nullifying my core, authentic self. But some part of me knew. My psychic gene knew. And every time a familial lie irritated my internal truth wiring it ‘zinged’ my psychic gene. Ultimately, my psychic gene dug into my conscious like a dog scratching a tick it can’t quite reach, but knows is there. So, the symptoms of psychic affliction surfaced repeatedly and I finally answered their call in the one safe and acceptable place for my soul: writing and words. I learned the power and exhilaration in naming unnamable things and the unconscious geyser I had corked and clamped for years finally had a blow-off valve. My psychic affliction proudly paraded itself through my written words, at first intermittent and sketchy, but then flowing . . . and my writing became the magic of channeling with Spirit. Of course, I didn’t fully know or understand I was engaging in a psychic activity at the time. If I had, I probably would have fearfully dropped my personal writing habit, concerned it was socially and familially unacceptable. I knew just enough to understand that at times, through my writing, I was connecting with a deeply personal spiritual place where the words spontaneously flowed. At times, I felt another hand writing with my own. At times, I felt words, not of my being flow through me as if they were. It did not frighten me. It empowered me. It was the best place I knew to be with myself, at once an exhilarating, life-filled present, connected peace--transcendental being at its finest. So, unbeknownst to me, the hunt for my lost and hidden soul was finally on. The hounds were unleashed and running. My writing became the consciousness of my unknown soul, and I fed its insatiable needs through writing, plucking at seemingly random chords from inside a piano like George Winston finding his way into and out of repeated dissonance. My psychic gene never let my consciousness rest. There was always some deeper truth to know and understand. I was always looking for it. So, alongside my psychic affliction, I also developed an interminable case of restlessness in wanting to know. Know what? I did not know. But I was bound to find the answer. This has perpetuated for years now: psychic affliction paired with deep soul truth seeking within myself, others and the world around me. It has all rendered itself into a nicely developing psychic gift. Only recently, do I now understand, it is my psychic gift paired with personal truth seeking that has ultimately created my emotional survival in this lifetime. My psychic affliction finally cracked the years and layers of unconscious familial code keeping I’ve participated in with my family. Waking to this has been uncomfortable, painful, healing, empowering and solitary making. Most of our culture, within the social circles of family, friends, school, work, church and organizations, currently functions upon a mostly acceptable parameter of sleeping emotional and psychological dysfunction. It’s an, ‘It’s okay to emotionally lie to me if it’s okay for me to emotionally lie to you’ system. It’s a system that is rooted within the unconscious and conscious emotional lies we carry within ourselves. It’s a system that helps us feel synthetically comfortable, ‘nice,’ and safe. It’s a system that is easy. But most of all, it is an emotional system that is NOT okay. Emotional lying (whether conscious, unconscious, subconscious) wounds the sacred, authentic self and those in the near vicinity, spreading out in the ripple effect. Emotional lying weakens the emotional, psychological and energetic integrity we experience within ourselves and with one another. Emotional lying weakens and wounds us...  To continue reading, please click on PayPal link below to purchase this complete article for only $1.99 Thank you for supporting an independent writer located in the Four Corners Region of the United States.
|
|
Send an Email to The Purple Phoenix
|
[Close window]